S65: Funnel Destination

The group wakes up in the tiny hut, and takes a quick assessment of their surroundings. They check on their favorite (not so favorite?) flesh ball, and Nom is still inside the burlap sack they placed her in the night before. As they are moving about their tiny hut, they hear a rustling from the bushes just outside their hut. They notice a very handsome man, adorned in beautiful yellow robes, with golden trim. The man pulls his cart past the tiny hut, and Krom pops out to say ‘hi’. The man is visibly startled, asking where this giant, muscular beast came from. Krom tells him that they are camping here, and the man seems confused at the lack of campsite. The man introduces himself as Robin Zander, and he is a merchant, currently a traveling merchant, owner and proprietor of ‘Wand you to Want Me’. This man is definitely a little quirky, flamboyant, even. 

Krom asks what he has for sale. As Robin begins to review his inventory, Mokon comes out of the hut. Robin is, again, startled. Mokon is also interested in what he has for sale. At this point, Alora gets rid of the tiny hut, the entire party is visible, and Robin is excited about the sales he is potentially going to be able to make. He tells Mokon of a ‘ring of unconsciousness’. Almost before he can finish the name of the item, Mokon says, ‘I’ll take it!’. Robin asks if he’d like to know what it does…. ‘Nope’. Robin gives Mokon the ring inside a beautiful box. Robin is very surprised that Mokon doesn’t want to see the ring, but no matter, Mokon puts the box into his pocket. Robin then turns his attention to the beautiful Alora. Complimenting her beauty, he offers her a pretty girl discount, one free item. Alora is taken back. She quickly opens the box, only to be doused with gallons of water.  A hysterical laugh erupts from Robin. ‘HAHahahAH, GOT EM!’ What an incredible prank. Alora is not amused. The group is asking more about the items Robin has, when Alora feels something squishy climbing inside her clothes. NOM! She thinks. She grabs at Nom, but she is too quick and scurries off. The vendor tells the group of some other items, such as the wand of magic MISS-iles. They don’t bite. ‘Ok, ok, let’s see what else…’ As Robin tries to find items more equipped to this adventuring party, Alora is still sopping wet, and not in the good way… she casts sleep on Robin, but Robin does not take kindly to this, and counterspells Alora’s attempt. ‘Naughty, naughty girl, can’t a guy just try and make a living?’. He moves on, and hears something spelunking around in his cart. With a quick strike, he grabs the Kirkland style flesh light, and puts it in a sack, tied tightly. ‘Why do you keep this thing with you?’ He asks. The group explains Nom’s plight, and offers her to Robin. He politely declines. He then tells Krom about a ‘Got Em Box’. Again, the party does not even want to know what it does before purchasing. Robin decides it’s good business to explain anyway. Krom seems happy with his purchase. Robin, feeling bad, then offers Alora an ‘I’m sorry gift’. Alora doesn’t take it. Robin opens up the box, and inside is the most beautiful ornate ring any of them have ever seen. ‘Ok, then’, Robin puts the box back into his pocket. 

As Robin goes to show the group even more of his wares, Krom feels something crawling around on him. With his sharp claws out, he grabs the pink pile of goo, and is visibly frustrated. While discussing what they should do with Nom, leave her in the woods, and try to kill her, they ask if Robin has anything that could contain her. They’re in luck! Robin just so happens to have a ‘Demon Lock Box’ tucked away for just such an occasion. He quickly grabs it. He pulls out a very basic looking wooden box. He tells them that the box can keep demons inside, not allowing them to escape. Krom quickly grabs it, and opens the box to stuff their frenemy inside. Just as he opens the top, gallons of water splash onto Krom and Nom, as Robin bursts into laughter again! ‘GOT EM!, a demon lock box?! What even is that?! Still got it, I suppose.’ The group decides to still utilize the wooden box and try to keep Nom inside. 

As they are dealing with Nom, a familiar face comes out of the woods behind them. It’s Echo/Rally. He greets the group with a hearty hello, and a surprised hello to Robin! Alora asks how they know each other, together, they explain they used to live in a little town called Drallamar, where Robin originally opened his Wand you to Want Me shop. After some quick friendly greetings, Robin casts prestidigitation onto Rally to clean him up from the blood he has all over him. Alora jumps in the way and gets herself dry. Robin is pleased, and lets out a small laugh. This one is quick, he thinks. He casts the spell again onto his old friend, and Rally asks about what has happened to him since he’s been here. Robin explains that he has been living in the town of Pilliwinks, running his shop. He had to evacuate when things got a bit too weird. He asks what he means, and Robin goes into more detail, stating that the townsfolk were becoming emotionless, and seemingly losing all personality. They would still mill about the town, but without purpose almost. Robin continues to tell the group that he is heading to Therack to hopefully open up a business there. The group then tells him that may not be the best idea, as a powerful Demon Lord, Yeenoghu, has just ransacked the place, and much of the city is dead. Robin is appreciative of this info, and wonders why the group didn’t tell him this the first time he mentioned his destination… He asks the group if they could suggest a place, and they tell him to try down south, BrazenBull Fort. Rally offers to accompany Robin on his travels, as no one is even sure the town is safe. Robin quickly accepts his offer. 

Before Robin leaves, he offers Alora a non-prank item, in the form of a ‘Wand of Detect Magic’. Alora is skeptical, but takes the gift. She asks Krom to open it. Flower petals explode from the box, covering Krom with the most gorgeous flowers. ‘GOT EM!’ Some of the flowers even stick into his mane, they really bring out his eyes. Inside the trick box, lies the wand promised to Alora. She grabs it, and is thankful. He also lets Krom know about a piece of leather he may be interested in, this belt has an ornate buckle that allows the wearer to tell what time it is at any point in the day. WOW! Dorus also picks himself up a ‘Trident of Dampening’, and wanting to try out this fork-sized trident, he casts it accidentally hitting Alora. Alora’s clothes instantly feel damp, not wet, just damp enough to be uncomfortable, like if you took them off the line 20 minutes too early. She is not impressed, but Dorus is happy his purchase works! Lastly, he offers up a Hammer of Long Rest/Short Rest. This hammer causes immense damage to the willing user being hit, but gives them the immediate benefits of a long rest or short rest after a short unconscious period (assuming they survive the damage). Mokon immediately needs this hammer, and almost as quickly, tries it out on himself, knocking himself unconscious. The group is a bit worried, Robin included, but they wait to see Mokon wake up feeling better than he had before being struck with the hammer. Robin and Rally/Echo walk off into the sunset, destined for great things, I’m sure.

The group wrestles with the idea of just leaving Nom hanging from a tree branch. Safe and sound and very far away from the precious items. Mokon has other plans. He takes the well wrapped box and connects it to the end of a long stick. He’ll take Nom with them… at a safe distance. The SOG venture forth, traversing the dense forest toward the giant spinning purple tornado. The air grows colder. The daylight becomes a strange pale gray as the sun's rays pass through the purple sky. The group stops to plan in a small clearing. Alora decides to scout ahead to get a better idea of what is in store. She casts invisibility upon herself before disappearing into the trees once more. A few moments later and a few hundred feet between herself and her crew she begins to hear whispers. Flashes of light and ethereal apparitions float by as Alora hears faint whispers of the dead. She looks upward seeing the culmination of the funnel. Dark holes open and close in the pillar of purple haze as it spins downward. In the center, a lone individual. Dark gray robes float in the wind of a sickly thin being looking upward. Wisps of ghostly green mist drift from its body. Its mouth opens wide as the center of the sky funnel is seemingly ingested. A thick torrent of souls encircle the figure as if a protective shield for their master. Alora does not believe she is seen. Returning to her party she relays what she has seen. 

No time like the present. The group ventures forth in hopes of talking to this strange individual. Krom breaks through the forest wall striking up a very informative conversation. The being closes its mouth and turns to Krom. The group sees the deep receded red eyes in a familiar face. Kruss? Is that Kruss? A familiar yet heavier voice speaks. “My friends the Butcher’s of Pillory, or I guess you are known now as the Saviors of Grimshackle. It has been some time.” The group begins to question Kruss about what happened to him. “Yes, it has been some time. My time with Benny was very… eventful. Time dilation is a wonderful experience. Ten thousand years has taught me so much. You should see Benny. Quite magnificent.” Realizing Kruss was difficult to fight before and now he is even more powerful the party does their best to convince him to help them for the greater good. Kruss has his own plans and although he is willing to work with them -- he will do so under his own conditions. And his conditions are that the group bring Adeline Gummnibbler’s soul fragments to him. “We will do great things together. I will stop those who cause pain and eliminate the pain to those who endure. I will never be the lapdog of another EVER again.” And with the flick of his wrist dark flash. At the end of a black tether extending from his wrist on all fours, weak, bloodied, and beaten cowers Black Pearl. “Please no more she pleads.” Kruss swings an open fist. The backhand of his bony hand knocks Black Pearl to the ground. “You will never be my master again. You will never throw me away… again.” 

The party is silent only for a moment before they begin to plead with Kruss to have him help against Yeenoghu. “Oh, I have plans for him. He will not be a problem for long.” 

Kruss looks toward Mokon. “Mokon, you and I are on the same path. I work to eliminate pain. You work to alleviate it. Why not join forces? Illmater would be proud of our partnership. I am sure.” Mokon thinks for a moment before explaining he is not interested. “Are you sure? We would be great together.” Mokon is sure. “Too bad. Well, I’ll take that back.” Kruss snaps his fingers as Mokon feels his armor, helm, and gauntlets loosen as they fall from his body in straps of mundane iron. “Well at least you can be a bit of protection for me.” Unsure what Kruss means, Mokon waits for the worst. Nothing seems to happen. Strange.

The group begins to whisper tactics. “Do not think you are speaking privately. I can hear and see many things through ethereal means.” They wonder if Kruss can hear and see them through the souls.

Dorus has had enough and launches a single glowing arrow toward Kruss. It penetrates the spinning wall of souls piercing Kruss’ shoulder. He winces ever so slightly. The arrow which typically dissipates glows brightly in Kruss’ shoulder. He looks at it, then toward Dorus. With a thin hand he slowly exudes the arrow from his body and squeezes. A dull explosion of light. The arrow is gone. “Now Dorus, is that any way to treat a friend?”

Alora, still invisible, begins to try to find a path to Kruss through the shield of souls. As she approaches she feels pain. A sad pain that pulls at her mind. She knows venturing forth would not go well. Dorus has a similar thought, not knowing Alora’s plan. He too feels the danger of entering the ring of death.

Mokon has a thought and hucks the box o’ Nom at Kruss. The box bounces off some sort of invisible field right before hitting him and crashes to the ground. “Now Mokon. Don’t be that way.” Nom’s small pink body bounces and bangs against the inside of the wooden box. Then, she notices a small section of light. Wriggling and flattening herself she escapes her enclosure. She sees Kruss above her and darts up his body in the hope of an expensive meal. She finds none, but Kruss does find her. Grasping tightly Kruss raises Nom into view. “What is this? How interesting. Here, I think you lost this.” Kruss hurls the pink blob back toward the group. Nom is free once more and she disappears into the underbrush. 

Dorus tries another approach to reach Kruss, summoning a spiral of his own spirits. He approaches Kruss. As he does so opposing souls collide. Dorus watches as his beautiful smiling female spirit's faces begin the change into those of torment and pain. Kruss’ souls far outnumber Dorus’. This will not work. Dorus takes a step back. Just then he feels something in his pack. Nom! He fumbles around with his trunk pulling out a very full Nom. He watches a worthless metal coin falls from her backside. Dorus isn’t happy. He tosses Nom toward Mokon who isn’t really ready for the catch. He fumbles and Nom escapes into the forest. 

Kruss speaks. “I do not want to fight you. But I will if provoked. Dorus that is two.” 

Alora realizes there has to be another way. Still invisible she sneaks to Dorus and sends a mental message, to avoid Kruss hearing the conversation, telling Dorus she is going to take the soul catching amulet. Dorus allows it to happen. The amulet turns invisible as Alora puts it around her neck. Kruss does not seem to notice.

Krom, being ready for Nom at all times, feels an almost unnoticeable pressure on his leg. With catlike reflex he grabs Nom’s pink soft body and begins to squeeze. Krom does not know Nom well. He has few feelings, and even fewer acts of forgiveness. He squeezes tighter. Nom feels her body getting crushed and begins to ooze from his grip changing into a slim like consistency. Krom begins to lose his grip. Dorus rushes over to help contain Nom’s slippery body.

“I find this so very entertaining.” Kruss smiles and laughs watching the party fight amongst themselves.

Dorus feels rage. His eyes narrow as he casts spiritual weapon. A large hammer appears above Kruss’ head and comes down hard knocking Kruss sideways. With an unnatural speed Kruss grabs the hammer from the sky (Dorus has never seen anyone do this before) and hurls it back toward Dorus. It dissipates before it reaches the loxodon.

“I’ve had enough.” Kruss turns toward the group.

Alora knows this is her last chance. Taking a leap of faith she casts a dimension door. Falling backward into a magical doorway she appears directly behind Kruss. Reaching outward with the soul catching amulet she touches it to Kruss’ body. He gasps as he falls forward. Alora stays close, making sure the amulet never breaks contact with Kruss’ body.

“What are you doing? You don’t want this. I can help you.” Kruss collapses to the ground. “You are making a mistake. You are…” Kruss exhales as his clothes fall flat. His body is no more. A dark purple light illuminates from the pendant. A fragment of Adeline waits inside.

Black Pearl begins to stand. Mokon, unsure of her intentions, magically paralyzes her in place. Alora stands in triumph, hopefully she made the right call. Krom and Dorus fight to hold a very determined and very slippery Nom.